Too cutsie??

Apparently my blog is too cutsie. T told me that I'm not being real in my writing. I think he wants me to rant and rave about the frustrations my children can bring into my life each day. I don't really think that's what this blog is for, but I'd be lying if I didn't say T was right too. I need to vent about things occasionally too. So here's my attempt at being real.

My kids do frustrate me. They drive me crazy sometimes. D bites, pulls out her hair, throws multiple temper tantrums for no apparent reason in a matter of minutes and screams and yells and cries. I may bite, and well, that's about all I does. The rest of the time he is smiling and laughing or sucking his thumb or sleeping. I can't complain about that AT ALL!

But even though I have those days that I just want to shut my door and leave them be, or shut them in their cribs and forget they are there for 10 minutes in order to gain back my sanity, I love them to pieces. I wouldn't trade them for anything and their safety is always at the forefront of my mind.

For example, yesterday was one of those days. Both of them were tired, and when that happens they cry and whine and D is more prone to tantrums. I know this, but sometimes it doesn't change the fact that I just don't want to cope.

BUT...

I love them. They come first. Always. When we got home yesterday, Michael (the dog) had gotten into I's trash can full of dirty diapers. Three of them were strewn all over the carpet. (Michael is locked in I's room when we leave the house. That's where his food and water and doggie door is.) Now, on more than one occasion this has happened. A smart person would realize that Michael likes the odor of the dirty diapers, will get into them, and will eventually get in trouble for it, so this person should probably make a change. Apparently we aren't smart people, because here we are with our second child in diapers and still, a trash can with no lid on it. But, of course, it's Michael's fault for getting into the dirty diapers.

Anyways, back to why my kids still come first.

After cleaning up the mess, T sprayed febreeze and lysol all over that room. It was such a strong odor. But what was my first thought, "make sure there is circulation in there while I's sleeping." See? My kids are always at the forefront. I do love them. Even though they make me crazy sometimes. It is so easy to receive a cute look from either one of them to wipe away the memory of the previous tantrum. But it doesn't change the fact that I had to deal with the tantrum too.

It kills me that most moms don't talk about their frustrations. I know that others have to feel this way too. Just because I want or need a break away from my kids DOES NOT make me a bad mom, it makes me human. I would worry if I didn't enjoy a few hours away from my kids. Or if I never wanted to leave them. I need that. I think most moms probably do at some point or another. But, most I don't think are willing to admit it. Not out loud and not for the world to read.

What that makes me, I'm not sure. But I'm hoping T will say it makes me real.